Richards' statements brought hugs and support from the Dixie Chicks, whose popularity among mainstream country music fans plummeted when singer Natalie Maines told a London audience, in what she called "a joke," that

"Just so you know, we're ashamed the President of the United States is from Texas."

Illuminated by the beautiful dancing firelights of burning Peugots and Citroens set ablaze by French youth also repressed by the American government, Maines told the audience, "I believe my friend Michael, whom I a proud to call the first Chixie Dick. Of course he was under the direct control of Republicans and he meant to call the hecklers evil Republican Christian Zionist Texans."

The bold comments of the Fourth Dixie Chick brought an overwhelmingly positive response in France and among progressive circles in the United States. Pleased with Richards' nuanced and European perspective, French broadcasters immediately renamed "Seinfeld," the TV show that made Richards rich and famous. It's new name is "Le Show de Michael Richards." In addition, French broadcasters moved to delete "the taint of Judeo-Zionazi" influence from the show by changing the credits of the French version to remove the Jewish-sounding names of several actors on the show and give them more "mainstream, American-sounding" names.

As as a result, Jerry Seinfeld is now identified as Jerry-John Edwards, Julia Louis-Dreyfus has become Julia Alcee-Hastings, and Jason Alexander is Jason Rodham Pelosi. Michael Richards gets to keep his name, which, he explained, reflects the fact that "my parents were big fans of Ricky Ricardo."

The Dixie Chicks, with their revamped line-up, will continue their global tour this week with a command performance for Hugo Chavez in Caracas, Venezuela. Richards said he will rehearse with his new bandmates and will get a wardrobe of "cute, spangly outfits" so he'll fit in.

He also said, "I will be sure to wear a tinfoil hat to keep the bad Republican death rays out of my brain. From now on, I know what to call hecklers."