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August 15, 2007
Soundtrack for a Robot Tank Attack
Nothing gets the martial juices flowing like the prospect of robot attacks. Some recent articles about the reality of robot warriors inspired fevered comments on the sound-and-light aspects of an impressive robot offensive.
Music plays a role in the properly fearsome attack. Some schools of thought opt for fear-inducing music, such as "War Pigs" by Black Sabbath and other heavy-metal classics. I have no argument with this approach, but I wonder if thumping death-metal will really do the trick.
After all, you don't want your enemy to feel fear -- I would want my enemy to feel distracted. Here's how I'd do that.
I wouldn't assume opponents in a U.S. tank attack no English, so heavy metal lyrics would have little impact. The bad guys would just hear a wall of noise.
But, if the bad guys heard something with a good beat, then human nature would take over and, with any luck at all, before long they would forget about shooting and start getting down and funky.
My big idea: A robot attack to the soundtrack of "Saturday Night Fever." Sure, it's been out for 30 years, but even jihadis must have heard it somehow. If U.S. robots attacked and played, say, "If I Can't Have You" by Yvonne Elliman, then I guarantee the bad guys will get their groove thing on and will be doing the bump as our lasers cut them to ribbons.
Van | 08/15/07 at 10:06 PM | Categories: WWIV
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Comments
better yet how about Cat's "ride on the peace train" or "Morning has broken" as the Tanks start their attack. LOL Now that would distract the Jihadis!
Barry | August 16, 2007 10:56 AM
Dear KesherTalk Censors,
I heard that Rudy's kids hate him and are voting for a Dem.
Is that true?
If so...
Ha-ha!
Vote Rudy '08! (unless your his kids...)
kesherTalkCensors | August 16, 2007 11:38 PM
I toss in my vote for Black Sabbath. It's not because of the lyrics. It is the amped up, feedback screaming, chunk-a-chunka beat pumped through a sound system capable of creating levitation that would cause our targeted enemy to p*ss himself before taking his celestial dirt nap.
However, your idea of Saturday Night Fever soundtracks also has a bit of biting wit that intrigues me. If ever there was a lifestyle that epitomizes the decadence of the West, it would be Dance Fever USA. She's a brick house, gonna drop a bomb on you! Looooove to love you baby! And don't forget some Barry White..... ooohhh yeah!
Nancy Coppock | August 17, 2007 09:54 AM
Dear KTC - where do you get this "censor" crap? Also - do you realize I fished your tiny jewel of a comment out of a great stinky cellpool of spam? Just because I hat the idea that any real comments got deleted. So be grateful.
Are you from Kos or from the Ron Paul campaign?
there is an unconfirmed rumor that his daughter joined the Obama Facebook. so what.
Judith | August 17, 2007 09:55 PM
Nancy has an outstanding idea for expanding the Official Robot Wars Soundtrack. Dance Fever USA and Barry White are musts, as are Donna Summer's Greatest Hits and Madonna's Best. And just for name value -- Van McCoy singing "The Hustle."
And for the gentle jihadis into heavy eye makeup . . . let's give it up for Culture Club! I think of worse ways to die than listening to "Karma Chameleon."
Van | August 18, 2007 08:34 AM
Dear KTC,
Remember the Libby's tv ads with Libby the Kid ---that's 'Billy' spelled sideways--from the distant 1970's? In keeping, I would counter your taunt with one of my own. If Rudy's kids are voting Democrat for President, it's not their father they despise, but rather themselves. I don't know about you, but it's been decades since I've practiced the childish art of cutting off my nose to spite my face. YBM of Breath of the Beast has done yeoman's work establishing the connection between the Left and childishness. If indeed your taunt is true, then what more proof do we need? Time for a reality check, because thinking for yourself is not blindly thinking the opposite of Mommy and Daddy.
Nancy Coppock | August 18, 2007 11:00 AM
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