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June 12, 2009

Now That's Entertainment: Air Sex World Championship Competition Hits NY Tonight

Why did this have to be a kid weekend? Otherwise, I'd hightail down to the Highline Ballroom for the New York City Air Sex Finals. Based on the concept of air guitar, "air sex" is, well, use your imagination.

Part mime, part burlesque and all embarrassing fun, the Air Sex World Championships is holding competitions nationwide. New York is the fourth event of 16, ending in Tucson later this month.

The website uses plenty of photos and videos to carefully explain this difficult and demanding new sport. The rules show the seriousness of this exciting new form of entertainment:

Time: Contestants have a maximum of 2 minutes to perform an air sex routine. This can include all phases of an air sex encounter: meeting, seduction, foreplay and intercourse, or you can simply cut to the chase.

Music: Competitors must perform to music, you can either bring a CD of your performance track with you, or you can choose from our selection of air sex music. You may also include an audio prelude to your performance, maximum of 30 seconds.

Other Rules: Unlike air guitar, there are not many other rules. Props are allowed, teams are allowed, talking is allowed. The only important rule is that all sexual climaxes must be simulated, not real.

From looking at the website, some "brand names" are already emerging. Check out the videos of Slut Truffle in the Austin competition, where her tender, emotionally nuanced performances remind one of nothing so much as an air sex interpretation of "Swan Lake."

Down the road, I can see this becoming a hugely successful TV series, "So You Think You Can Do Air Sex?" with celebrity contestants and judges. I suggest starting with the cast of "One Day at a Time" and then move on to "Lost in Space" so we baby boomers can have performers we identify with. After that, celebrity face-offs, starting with Al Roker vs. Bill O'Reilly.

Van | 06/12/09 at 08:48 AM | Categories: Life and how to live it

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